Saturday, 5 December 2009


Why do I keep fucking up like this? I dont even know what happened yesterday I just couldnt stop eating and now I have gained like 5 lbs!! Some of it I can get rid of with Lax but I just feel like im taking massive steps backwards. I was doing so well. Losing weight, exercising, feeling happy. Now im fat again and I feel like I have to go through it all again just to get back to where I was. I'm going to get a quick bath, do my housework then workout for a couple of hours. My friend gets here at about 5 so I have 4 1/2 hours to work out as much as possible.
We are both water fasting so hopefully she will keep me strong. If I water fast today and tomorrow, combined with 2-3 hours of exercise today and 3 hours tomorrow then I should get back to where I was. My goal was to weigh 140 lbs by the end of the week. Now I have 8 fucking lbs to shift to meet that.
Plan: intake 0 cals, burn 2500 cals, water 3-4 ltrs.
I will not be beaten. I will not binge!


  1. It's okay hun, don't stress.
    Binge weight is almost NEVER permanent and usually goes down within a few days.
    Just try not to weigh yourself the next few days and youll be back down before you know it.

    You can do this! Stay strong hun, I can't wait to see how much you lose with this fast.

    XOXO Sophia Ruins <3

  2. dont worry about one slip up. i know its hard when you feel like youve been doing great and then you take a step back but dont worry, weve all been there before and trust me, its not all lost. i know you'll be back to your goal weight in no time. stay strong


  3. don't worry, you'll get over it and through it all.

  4. I start writing a blog about my life with my eating
    disorder and my addiction to fashion. I really need readers,
    because in my real life I had no listeners. Alone, yes I was
    always alone with my thoughts, in those days I didn't care about it.
    Untill I discovered the blogs and learnt how good it can feel to have
    readers. Readers, which share the same intress and have the same
    feelings after a shitty snack attack.

    Plz, visit me:

  5. damn, i know how that feels. i've been bulemic for almost three years now... i wanted to go down to 100 lbs, but there were complications... now, i'm trying to get down again, but it's so hard

    feel free to chat, if you'd like

  6. Hi, I'm Eli. Just found your blog and am really looking forward to reading the rest of your entries!

    Sorry about the binge-- I hate that feeling. Your goal sounds great. If I were you, I'd be worried that exercising that much would leave me vulnerable to a relapse binge :)

    Good luck!


  7. hello...
    hang on...there will be sunny days for us, when we will be able to wear the skimpiest bikini and look good and not feel ashamed...we will reach that day.
    It is a promise to myself and to all the other ED girls who exist in the whole world.
    Take care of you:*

  8. Hello,

    Really enjoyed reading your blog - although that sounds like the wrong emotion... I mean I was able to empathise and appreciated reading things that go through my head being articulated! Thank you.

    I need laxatives! What over the counter are best to buy - can anyone tell me?

    Sorry if thats an inappropriate qu.

    Thank you for all you write. Stay strong! You're incredible and can achieve all you want too - Stay calm and carry on!

    Love Georgie